Obersee News from June 5, 2008
In the new umbrella organization for shared parenthood, fathers are fighting for shared custody.
GeCoBi stands for the newly founded Swiss Association for Shared Parenthood.
A father who has been fighting for joint custody of his children for years (ON reported) hopes that mother and father will soon be legally equal.
Four years ago, ON reported on the fight of Stephan Lichtin (43) from Tann for joint custody of his two children (now 11 and 10 years old).
Lichtin had done everything, personally and professionally, to be “acceptable” to the court as a good father. As a self-employed trustee and IT specialist, he had reduced his work to 60 percent just to have enough time for child care. In 2001, the Bülach district court courageously spoke out in favor of shared parental custody and determined that the children could live with Lichtin for an average of three days a week.
The mother was obliged to earn 2,000 francs a month to support herself.
But it took a single appeal and the Zurich High Court and everything was overturned again. It was decided that the mother should stay at home and devote herself fully to the children. “The difference for maintenance was then paid by the welfare office of the city of Zurich,” says Lichtin. A mountain of files and nothing achieved “Why are mothers so favored over fathers?” Lichtin's question is not only directed at society, but rather at the legislature. The current Swiss practice is to give the children into the care of only one of the two parents in the event of a separation. This means that the other parent – usually the father, sometimes the mother – is deprived of parental responsibility. However, joint custody in Switzerland is still only possible at the request of both parents.
“But if the child's mother gets in trouble, the father usually has nothing to do,” complains the beleaguered dad about the practice. He should know, because the mountain of files documenting his seven-year divorce battle “Lichtin versus Lichtin” – with decisions, allegations, accusations and fears – has now reached a considerable height. In vain, the result of the divorce is extremely sobering for Lichtin: “The establishment of joint parental custody failed due to the child's mother's stubbornness.
Despite many attempts, she did not allow herself to be persuaded to mediate and thus find a common solution.
» For Lichtin, the most shocking thing about it is that the ex-wife is “still being rewarded” by the justice system for this refusal, as he puts it.
assures us that he is a good father and that he fought in solidarity with many other affected fathers in order to finally bring about a fundamental change in court culture and practice in Switzerland.
could have avoided
all of these confrontations But I couldn't do that.
I love my children, want to see them grow up and be able to share in the responsibility of raising them.” To reinforce this, Stephan Lichtin moved from Tann to Zurich in 2005 to be closer to the children.
He now lives in the same neighborhood, just a block away from the child's mother. This is ideal for the children, he says. “They have two familiar homes and yet only one social environment.” The children can easily meet up with their friends, pursue their sports and music lessons without always having to think about whether they are at home with their father or mother. That is also what he means by “real shared parental care”. He is convinced that arguments should never be fought on the children's shoulders. Moving forward with solidarity The Swiss Association for Shared Parenthood (GeCoBi) is also striving for this demand:
If the parents do not agree, both should take responsibility for 50 percent of the care and upbringing work. This is the starting point for the negotiation if one parent does not want or cannot accept this 50 percent job. In order to push through these and other legal changes, 13 of the most important fathers' and children's rights organizations from all over Switzerland gathered on the Bundesplatz in Bern on May 17th for a rally and to found their umbrella organization www.GeCoBi.ch .
With constructive suggestions, one would particularly like to put an end to the wars of the roses that are all too common today in the event of a separation.
An important point here: Affected parents should only be admitted to court if they have made serious efforts to reach an amicable agreement.
This requires skewers of equal length for fathers and mothers. Stephan Lichtin: "While these elementary principles have long been established in large parts of Europe, the divorce industry in Switzerland is still having a very difficult time with them." Verena Schoder