Below we publish an open letter from a woman to Federal Councilor Sommaruga.
Dear Ms Sommaruga,
as a mother of three children, living in divorce, with shared custody, the children live 50% with both parents, as a partner of a divorced father with 4 children, a 2-week-old dad and as a friend of several divorced fathers and as a mentor to their children, As a kindergarten teacher and as an active supporter and member of the Association for Responsible Fathers and Mothers, I am speaking to you today after your decision:
Your decision hits many fathers right in the heart and causes pain, sadness and despair as well as anger.
Times have changed - as have our fathers! Laws are there to prevent injustice and to guide and protect us as humans. They represent a reflection of our society and should testify to wisdom and humanity.
They are responsible for all people - not just women. Do you actually know how many fathers suffer under this legislation? Do you actually know how many children want a father and a mother and for them there is only a mother. Do you actually know that this law causes so much unhappiness and suffering because it is clear from the start that the mother has the children?
Have you ever listened to these fathers? Do you know children from such divorced marriages and do you know how much they suffer when they only see their fathers every 2nd/3rd? See the weekend? When they aren't even allowed to make phone calls during the week - because their mother forbids them. I am aware that this is about interpersonal relationships and that is always very complex and emotional.
But how can you call yourself a representative of the people if you overlook the fact that grievances and injustice are increasingly taking shape in our society.
I know such children who slowly but surely fall apart between the two fronts and acquire characteristics in order to be able to "survive" in them. No rosy future prospects for our state. Because making up for these deficits will cost us a lot more in the long run than listening to them and their fathers now. Many of them are desperate and are joining an anti-feminist campaign launched by the SVP. In my opinion, they are just taking advantage of their plight to win them over to their own cause - like women back to the stove. Today it's no longer about women versus men. This means polarizing in the worst possible way and can only mean new struggle and new suffering. We are much more than just man and woman. There has to be a better way, that's why I appeal to your common sense and to the healing power and power of a feminine that flows impersonally throughout the universe and includes us all. The children are our future, the fathers are suffering and believe me, many have left the fight precisely because they experience firsthand how much the children suffer. But they are so exposed to their mother's whim and are often forced to endure. Please talk to Oliver Hunziker.
He is the president of the Association for Responsible Fathers and Mothers and a wise, motherly, fatherly person. I was so amazed when I met these men, I always thought of fathers who don't want to pay and are happy when they don't have to do child labor. But that's not the case at all - on the contrary. I myself have taken on a lot, precisely because I saw how much my children love and need their father and how much their father, just like me, loves them and has the right and dignity to look after his children. All these fathers lose their dignity, they are changing.
because it seems as if mothers have forgotten their motherhood. If you want to find out more about me, then watch the 10vor10 program from Wednesday, October 6, 2010 .
Kind regards, Franziska Moser